"Tis Forbidden"


You know how when your parents 'forbid' you from eating something or doing something or saying something, and you are more tempted than ever to do that very thing. This post is about that, but its about a girl.

Those of my readers who know me personally, will probably be having worried thoughts, and curious frowns on their faces right about now. Allow me to reassure you, all is well, and I have not done anything stupid...but I am about to.

All guys, straight guys, when they are free of work or related thoughts, are always subconsciously analyzing the women in their given area. This process of analysis is often referred to as 'checking her out'. We all do it, its instinctive, to be on the lookout for the best and most compatible female we would like to be with, a process coined as  'dating'. Now, it has become a perpetuated norm, that those already in the process of 'dating' should no longer participate in the previous process 'checking out'. But it is near impossible to follow, if your mind is not preoccupied to not participate in that process, it is unnatural. While I know that men do it, my observations suggest that women do it almost just as often, if not more. Comparing our existing partner with a potential one.

Now, there are too many factors involved in moving from the checking out stage to the dating stage, which are different in each scenario, but certain common factors pertain through all relationships. One of those factors, is personality compatibility. Now, I spoke earlier of how you are more tempted by something that you are forbidden from, and that is where these two subjects, coincide in this post.

To share a hypothetical situation with fictional characters, the male here, Mr. X, is dating Ms. Y. They have been in this stage for some time now, but are currently in a rough area reconsidering their choices. Mr. X has a friend, her name is Ms. A. She is in the 'checking out' stage, and has her many good qualities. Now, considering Mr. X's situation with Ms. Y, he is clearly participating in both those stages and finds Ms. A to be quite interesting and desirable. However from what he already knows about Ms. A, he comes to the conclusion that they are not, personality compatible, and that he may have a next to 0% chance even if he tried. Knowing these results of his analysis stage, he finds himself attracted to her, and longing to spend more time with her, while still dating Ms. Y, whose inner thoughts and intentions on these matters are unknown to him. The question arises, if Mr. X and Mr. Y end their dating stage, should he take a risk and show his interests in Ms. A, in spite of the analysis, or simply remain friends with her, and shift his attention to seeking more likely partners?

Failing to find a solution to this hypothetical dilemma of fictional character Mr. X, I put this across to you, the readers, hoping for responses from both men and women, to come to the best possible solution. Leave a comment with your responses, and I will get back to you.


*I mean no disrespect to women, or suggest that men are not loyal in relationships, but that they simply cannot help but notice women they find attractive if their minds are not occupied with pressing thoughts.

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