What's Missing?

I have often said unto others that life is about finding happiness, but am often stumped when I cannot even answer to myself, what is happiness? How do you know when you have it?

Its again been a long while since the last post, which have been left incomplete in the series as they were too cheerful for the intent and purpose of this blog. The time continues to roll by, the days seem to go by faster even though the nights shorten as summer approaches. In a couple of weeks, it'll be exam time again, scrambling for notes, assignments and nervous eating. The internship frenzy has begun already and yet again, being part of GGSIPU curriculum, the semester ends a month after that of DU and most of the good ones are already taken. Nonetheless, as someone once said, battles are won by preparation, and with that I began keeping an eye out for any news on possible internship offers and updating my resume.

It was while rewriting that one page of information about myself and my achievements that I realize how few of those I have. I never participated in any competitions, so there isn't even a scope of positions or prizes won. My marks are best left unmentioned, not that they are very low, they are actually exceptionally average, which is why. However, it is looking like a much better bio than the one I had a year ago. Since then, I have taken many short assignments and projects for various individuals and companies, most of which are in the field of photography and design, which from the lack of response to my application in newspapers doesn't seem appropriate for a writing job.

Anyhow, turning my attention back to the original purpose of this post, an experience I want to share and discuss with you, reader. Not too long ago, I wrote a post about how I appreciated my life and how fortunate I am to have it all. But lately, quite often I feel rather empty. I have all my needs taken care of, good food, good home, good clothes, good family good people, and yet I still feel as my life is hollow and without joy. Now, don't get me wrong, I've been having a lot of fun days with friends and family, outings and dinners and movies and whatnot, yet, that happiness fades as quickly as it comes. I look around me, and I hear my failures seem to echo in my heart and mind, the faint taunts of dreams and ideas unfulfilled. The pile of work that needs to be done, college, studies and for developing professional prospects is one that keeps getting higher every hour. The emotional strains of a college adolescent are an unwelcome additional burden to the already overworked vitals of an individual.

There are all these problems, none of them dire of course, I'm not being a first world nation whiner, but am perplexed by my emotional and mental condition. I can find nothing wrong with my surroundings. I have my family, my friends, my really close friends and even a partner...yet, I feel isolated in my vast social network. The question I simply fail to answer right now is, if everything is right yet all feels wrong, then what is missing?

*Oh, a quick update, a project I was working on has finally come into action, a campus show for online radio, hosted by my colleague and good friend Aditi Walia now airs every Wednesday on www.firemudfm.com at 6 pm IST. Do tune in, and follow the show on her fb page, https://www.facebook.com/RJAditiWalia
Thank You!!