69 Days Later

It has been 69 days since I left Delhi to live and work in Bengaluru.

I got an internship with a start-up in this new city, with a new type of work folio that was still mostly alien to me(and still is). I'm getting a decent stipend considering my earlier employers and I still manage to be broke by the end of every month. With no personal transport to drive around in, my driving soul feels choked, even though this city is worse than any I've seen till date in terms of road infrastructure. So I took up an old hobby, cycling. Every weekend, wake up early enough to avoid the hordes of maniacal buses and retarded cabbies to go for a long ride and I can do something I enjoy and feel proud of. With time, I may even build up the strength and enthusiasm to go on to cycle long distance routes up to a hundred kilometers. But that's a long while away and depends on where I am a few months from now. 

69 days away from my guitars, and the longing has started to kick in, with the guilty thoughts of buying a new one here. I brought the camera with me, and I even got the old Sony here back in action, but I haven't snapped anything yet. I've finished every XBOX 360 game with a story, after all these years, and now I need to save to buy more. But I still have limited playtime between work and not exposing my lil cousins to the graphic violence of the games I enjoy. 

69 days away from the rooms(at home and my car) where I could be free within walls. Away from the few friendly faces that made my days better, with none here yet. Unrestricted access to beers and affordable pubs have lost their charm already and the pull of sobriety is stronger than that of the happy stupor. 

69 days since my hopes were refreshed with optimism, the all too familiar taste of disappointment and dissatisfaction have sunk in to every meal. Still just as unsure of the answer to the genie's question of "What do you want to do?" I could ask for anything and I still won't have an answer. And if I can't answer that, its irrelevant what can I do. This is where I am, less unhappy perhaps credit to certain developments in the personal life, but still facing the day with the same deep breath to steel myself and get through it without incident. 

This is where I am, 69 days later.

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